“Sometimes the only thing you can do is keep an eye on them”
There’s always a feeling of relief to be in the car with Charlie, because I know exactly where he is, the backseat (we have a station wagon but he has not wanted to sit in the trunk, yet). It’s especially a relief to get into the car after being out and about: It’s good to go places with Charlie, but whether it’s the subway in New York or a parking lot at the store, that worry of him wandering off—of him getting lost—is omnipresent. The worry can be compounded by the fact that Charlie might not think of himself as lost, not to mention numerous other worries—stranger danger…….
Today’s San Jose Mercury-News has an article on autistic children getting lost Danny Barrett spent 18 hours walking in a creekbed at Uvas Canyon County Park before he was spotted in a ravine; a boy in Florida went out of his house during a holiday celebration and was found in a swimming pool. Jacob Allen was lost in a West Virginia park and was—-in a most happy ending—-found after three days.
There are iron-on labels to sew into shirts and identification bracelets. But as Anna Wang, whose autistic son is 18 and who is the founder of the Friends of Children with Special Needs Dream Center in Fremont, California, ”‘Sometimes the only thing you can do is keep an eye on them, but even that isn’t always enough.’”
Charlie’s not one for holding my hand these days, but you can be sure I hold onto the hem of his coat when we get off the train—-and in parking lots, too.
14 opinions for “Sometimes the only thing you can do is keep an eye on them”
Leanne
Nov 23, 2007 at 2:17 pm
Oh yes, even at age 5 Patrick has started wanting to walk without holding hands. I have held on to the hem of his clothing countless times.
Kristina Chew, PhD
Nov 23, 2007 at 2:26 pm
Charlie shakes me off!
jypsy
Nov 23, 2007 at 2:33 pm
I really like Alex’s ID bracelet. They ( Road ID) have ankle bracelets as well and “dog tags” and stuff that will help people be seen at night. Alex is getting some of their reflective shoelaces for his birthday as well as some stick on reflective stuff (shhh don’t tell).
VAB
Nov 23, 2007 at 2:35 pm
Have you considered putting a cell phone in his pocket (maybe even in sewn-in buttonable pouch). Then you could use a service like this:
http://www.accutracking.com/
or this:
http://www.travelbygps.com/articles/tracking.php
to quickly locate Charlie if he wandered off.
Kristina Chew, PhD
Nov 23, 2007 at 3:29 pm
Thanks for the suggestions—-not quite ready here for the cell phone pouch and Charlie doesn’t have laces on his shoes (yet); someday.
Jennifer
Nov 23, 2007 at 3:51 pm
One thing I do with one of my students who does not like to have her hand held is to carry something with her (a neck lanyard, a grocery bag, anything so we are both connected to the same thing). It has the effect of staying “connected” with her without her having to tolerate someone touching her hands and without looking like one of those wrist straps.
livsparents
Nov 23, 2007 at 5:32 pm
You’d think with the wireless technology we have today, that someone could build something that would beep when the base and the remote got too far apart, the GPS would probably push the price up there, but when I see GPS car maps on sale for 129, the idea is probable out there and ready to be implimented for 69$. A beeper would at least alert to a problem…
Marla
Nov 23, 2007 at 8:55 pm
I have to watch our daughter like a hawk. She is a bolter and has no concept of traffic, parking lots, crossing streets etc.
jypsy
Nov 24, 2007 at 6:39 am
Just because Alex *has* laces, doesn’t mean he can *tie* laces. Although he has, and it takes much time and the end results aren’t very good, on race day *I* tie his shoes (and after this incident I double knot them). With his every day sneakers, they stay tied (slightly loose) and he slips his feet into them.
jypsy
Nov 24, 2007 at 6:51 pm
Early this morning, after I posted the above comment and as I got ready to go to Alex’s race, I mentioned having made this comment to my husband. The following conversation ensued:
Him: You should teach Alex to tie his shoes
Me: Well, he can tie his shoes, it’s just kinda like a kid tying their skates - it takes a while, they end up loose, and they’re not really good at it. Besides, he just slips his feet into his regular sneakers……
Him: So do I
Me: Exactly, and so does his brother, and if I’m wasn’t there on race day he has friends there who would tie his shoes for him. In fact, if he didn’t have anyone to tie his shoes he’d have a bigger problem than not knowing how to - it would mean he had no mother and no friends.
Today’s race was a good illustration of the friend he’s made through the PEI RoadRunners. My daughter went with us and when Diane introduced herself to her she told her “Alex is my boyfriend”. As well, 2 people showed up with gifts for Alex, one because “when I saw it I thought of Alex, I didn’t run this race” and the other because he and Alex have been fans of each other for a couple of years now and, since he knows how much Alex appreciates the Boston Marathon posters he’s given his the past 2 years, he brought him a poster and hat from the New York City Marathon he ran a few weeks back. Photos and Alex’s comments on his blog post from today’s race
jypsy
Nov 24, 2007 at 7:30 pm
And if you did tie Alex’s shoelaces, this is what you’d see.
Kristina Chew, PhD
Nov 24, 2007 at 7:31 pm
Thanks! I’m still thinking about your final comment. Jim did a 5-miler this morning and saw lots of kids in a 1-mile fun run—-we’ll be there with Charlie at the next one.
This and Last’s Weeks Top Posts
Dec 2, 2007 at 8:21 pm
[…] “Sometimes the only thing you can do is keep an eye on them”It’s good to go places with Charlie, but whether it’s the subway in New York or a parking lot at the store, that worry of him wandering off—of him getting lost—is omnipresent. The worry can be compounded by the fact that Charlie might not think of himself as lost. […]
Regan
Oct 30, 2008 at 4:04 pm
I’m starting to more seriously look into what GPS technology has to offer–if there’s a system that can beep when a dog leaves an area and track for 5 miles on a cell phone, or the equivalent via a walkie talkie system in areas without cell towers, there must be equivalents for people.
FWIW, I have already found 2 way lockable wrist-watch systems, and even a tiny GPS that can be swallowed. So the technology is out there–it’s just finding what fits the particular conditions.
We don’t have problems with Eleanor wandering but a GPS would be useful to us in teaching her how to navigate from point A to B on her own, and as a backup just in case.
Is anyone actively using GPS and have any recommendations?
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