Autism Vox

3 opinions for This is my nightmare

• Alauda
  Jul 16, 2007 at 9:36 am

  ***CAUTION, may be TRIGGERING for survivors of childhood sexual abuse***

  Yep, there really are alot of sick twisted bastards out there that will take advantage of almost any vulnerability that a child , or adult for that matter, exhibits. Our body is 51yo and some of these creeps still try to engage us when we are in the childrens section ( toys,stuffed animals, hobbies, Gospel music and Bible stories for kids!) of various stores. A little explanation: We are a “mutiple” and have 11 children in our system and they really love toys, childrens’ Gospels, etc.. We have a pretty strong self-talk an self-singing character for many of our kids and so when one of these creeps starts “accidentally” brushing up against us is the toy section our self-talk turns into something like this…
  “NO, we already told you, you not allowed to
  kill anyone INSIDE the store! ”

  Works like a charm and these creeps scurry back down the filthy holes that they crawled out of. But when the abuser in a position of trust, as our primary abuser was, it can be very difficult for an autistic child to get themselves out of the situation or to inform a truely trustworthy adult. Here is part of our experience of a “walking human target”. We offer this here not as a “pity-party” but rather because of the God-sent triumph by which it concludes (or maybe just gets started).

  We thought you might enjoy reading this “poem card to God”. timmie is our 11 year-old alter that is part of the “coop” known as Chance. She is very, very special to us as she was the one who suffered more than 95% of the sexual abuse that was heaped on us in our childhood. How this child could get up every morning and go to school knowing full well that she would be raped that day and every day that she went to school (from 9 yo to 11 yo), we now know. The perp was a teacher/administrator at the school, and here comes the darkest part, he was also the head deacon at our Southern Baptist Church. For 41 years we have been trying to find out what threat he had used to keep our little timmie quiet. Well, we finally found out and I ( KK) went ballistic . This creep not only blamed timmie for what happened, by use of phrases such as “why did you (timmie) make me (the teacher/deacon) do this?” … “you are a sinful creature right to your very core and your sin fills your inside.”… “if you so much as glance at me at church, I will get the pastor to baptize you and so that the water can get to the sin that is inside you, that fills your filthy body, the pastor and I will hold you under until every part of you is filled with water, and you will drown.” (the creep knew from prior experiences that we were very afraid of deep water). When I heard this from timmie at a therapy session, I became all too aware of what this perp had STOLEN from our timmie: her safety, her self respect, her innocence, her joy, her freedom to just be a child, and finally her church. I screamed in a voice that could reach every soul in heaven and on earth, that the stealing stopped here this very day and that no man would steal from our timmie ever again! timmie wanted desperately to speak with a female pastor at a church that our nice neighbors go to. They realized how important this was to us and we got to meet with her that very afternoon/evening. God’s voice spoke through her and the words were PERFECT! God explained that His joy and His love would fill timmie this very night and push out forever the fear, the pain, the shame, and sadness that this evil man had forced into her. And this Joy, and this Love could never again be stolen, because it is God’s Joy, and God’s Love and no man can ever steal the gifts that God gives her. And God explained to all of us that the only reason that all this was happening this night was because while the evil man stole many things from her he could never steal her FAITH because she kept it so well-guarded within her heart. And it was this pure FAITH of a child that brought us all to His presence this night of miracles. When we got home timmie wanted to write a thank-you letter to God and the following is what she wrote:

  ” From timmie ”

  Dear God,

  I’d send You a card if I Knew Your address,

  Or my favorite toy, the one I like best.

  I’d give You my dog to have and to hold,

  Great riches of diamonds and silver and

  gold.

  But nothing on earth could ever repay,

  For the joy You gave me on this very day.

  For the angels who brought it,

  And wrapped it just right.

  For the peace that is brings me,

  To sleep through the night.

  My arms cannot reach to heaven above,

  As Yours did this night when You filled me

  with love.

  My heart is near bursting,

  From the joy that You send.

  A joy that NO man can steal,

  EVER again.

  My heart overflows this night,

  it is true.

  So I open it skyward and say…

  ” God, I love You ”

  timmie otSWnH

  About 7 years after we left that school, this perp was caught in the act and he is now in a place where he can NEVER hurt children again. It is a sick, sick topic to even have to think about, but for the sake of our “spectrum” loved ones we MUST remain ever vigilant.

• Regan
  Feb 1, 2008 at 4:13 pm

  This story came out from the AP about 5 days ago, and might be of interest is seeing whether one’s state is one of those listed as working to toughen up laws, and the nature of current loopholes. I highlighted some sections with a link to the full article.
  Lawmakers Crack Down on Abusive Teachers
  (…)”Lawmakers say they are concerned about an increasingly well-documented phenomenon: While the vast majority of America’s teachers are committed professionals, there also is a persistent problem with sexual misconduct in U.S. schools. When abuse happens, administrators too often fail to let others know about it, and too many legal loopholes let offenders stay in the classroom “(…)
  “A nationwide Associated Press investigation published in October found 2,570 educators whose teaching credentials were revoked, denied, surrendered or sanctioned from 2001 through 2005 following allegations of sexual misconduct. Experts who track sexual abuse say those cases are representative of a much deeper problem because of underreporting” (…)
  “In Utah, the numbers of abuses flat-out shocked state Rep. Carl Wimmer. “These things happen a lot more often than parents would think,” he said. “It seems we do have an unacceptable high amount of children who get violated in the classroom. One is too many.”
  http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5h28LEG90GGTAaEOfdBPKwb5kXdawD8UEDNO01

• Parents Sue School District For Not Protecting Their Daughter
  Jun 13, 2008 at 6:00 pm

  […] awful, and not the first such crime of this sort noted here—-and a puzzling response from the school district. Tags: asd, […]

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